Jack started kindergarten on Wednesday, August 13. I can't decide who was more excited--me or him. We had met his teacher the day before and he was super excited to get started. We picked out his outfit and packed his lunch and I was so happy that school hadn't yet started for me so I could take him his first few days. In the morning, I gave him his book. Our tradition has been to give Jack (and now Dani) a book that we sign and date on his first day of each school year. I drove him and was able to walk him into school and stay in the class for awhile with the rest of the parents. He looked so small walking the hallways, but he was excited and didn't seem overwhelmed at all. His teacher was welcoming and Jack naturally ran and got a spot front and center so he could be near the teacher. The teacher started by giving each student a name tag. She wanted to introduce the kids but also see how well they recognized their letters and their names. She picked up a name tag with "Axel" on it and commented on how the name was unique and asked if anyone could guess it. Jack yelled out, "Alex." Teacher was impressed that he was obviously already reading. When she held up "Brody" minutes later and Jack said the name, she said, "Wow. You're already learning how to read." Jack responded matter-of-factly, "I can read."
Shortly after the doling out of name tags, we were asked to leave. I couldn't wait to pick my little guy up. When he got in the car, the first thing he said was, "I cried a little today. I missed you." He was also upset because he didn't get to have as much recess because he took too long to finish his lunch. He informed me that this also made him cry. I asked him if he saw his lunch mail that I had sent in his lunch box. In the excitement of the day, he had missed the letter. He read it out loud in the car and then looked at me sweetly and said, "That's beautiful."
We talked about the day and then as night got closer, he got progressively more sad, claiming he didn't want to go back to school. After I tucked him in, I heard him upstairs in his room sobbing. It was completely heartbreaking. I went to lay down with him and he said that the day was just too long and he missed me too much. In the morning, he was in tears again, begging not to go to school and claiming he had a stomachache.
Even though he claimed that he had fun after I picked him up that day, he still said he didn't want to go back and the sadness grew. At night, he cried and cried in bed. I laid with him, trying to hold back my own tears, my heart breaking as I tried to pump him up and convince him that he would be fine and that new things are always scary.
On Friday, I wrote his teacher an e-mail. My biggest fear has always been that Jack will get swallowed up by his own shyness. He isn't like the other boys, and I mean that in the best possible way. He is sensitive, sweet, and kind. He doesn't goof off or wrestle with the other kids. He'll never cause an ounce of trouble. He's also so smart. I was afraid that he wouldn't get any attention--negative or positive because the teacher's attention would be directed at misbehaving kids or kids struggling with concepts. Jack is an amazing boy who is so worth knowing, but he doesn't always let people know him. At least not right away.
Fortunately, his teacher is excellent and assured me that he would be fine and that she would be looking out for him. A week later, he became a different kid. He loves school and his wonderful teacher. She had him tested for reading the first day of school and we have learned that he is already reading at first grade level. He spends reading time practicing with a girl in his class-the only other one who can read at his level. His teacher gave him a job in the library and he was also selected as the class's first VIP. In sum, Jack's teacher did so much to help him feel special and important and his confidence has grown.
He's still nowhere near the most boisterous boy in class and he still hasn't mentioned finding a special friend to hang out with. But he's happy and he's having fun and I know that, if he can't be in our hands, he's in the best hands possible. Which is exactly what this sweet boy deserves.
