1 MONTH!

Unbelieveable! Jack is one month old. It's really hard to believe. Sometimes if feels like I had him just yesterday and sometimes I feel as if I have always had him! He is getting bigger and his cheeks are getting chubbier. He is starting to learn new things. When he cries because he is hungry, he gets quiet right after I put his bib on because he knows that his bottle is coming. He is focusing more on faces and turns his head to find my face when I am talking. If his eyes are open when he is eating and I start to talk to him, his pupils widen and his eyes light up. He likes his plastic key toys--they're colorful and fun to look at. He's starting to smile a little more, though not really in response to us yet. You might get a little smile if you kiss him on the cheek or corner of his mouth. He loves to be talked to and sung to. It doesn't even have to be a real song. I just kind of make them up on the fly. There's "Jack is gonna eat real soon," and "Daddy's fixing your bottle." Those are two of his favorites, even though the words are never the same because I forget what I have sung before! He also likes "Jack's a Stinky Baby" sung to Beyonce's "All the Single Ladies". "Jack's a Stinky Baby" can also be changed to "Jack's a Crabby Baby," or "Jack's a Naked Baby," when he is getting a bath. He is sleeping fairly well and usually goes 3-4 hours between feedings at night. After his early morning feeding (usually around 5-6 am) we go back to bed and Jack gets to come into Mommy's bed and snuggle, which we both love. We snuggle and talk (and I sometimes get some smiles) and then we fall asleep for 3 to 4 hours more (if Mommy is lucky).

All of this makes me so sad that I only have one more month off of work before I have to go back. I know that a month is still a good deal of time but it will never be enough! I love staying at home with him and know that I will be bawling my eyes out the day I have to return to work. Fortunately, we are leaving him in good hands with his Grandma. And fortunately, we have the best jobs in the world for being parents. It will just be two months and then we will be off for summer break. That won't, however, stop us from playing the lottery every week so that we can be stay at home parents! Could we swing it on one salary? Probably (but it would be really tight!). But we would have to cut back on so many things that we like to do and we would be so limited on what we would be able to do with Jack (i.e. vacations, taking him to the theater someday, etc.) that it wouldn't be worth it.

I do know, however, that my priorities at work will definitely change. No more staying late, better budgeting of my time at work so I can hurry home and spend time with my favorite student, etc. And I think that it will be healthier for me. I tend to obsess about work and my lesson planning and though that is good, I often stress myself out. I know having Jack will add to the stress of having too much to do but I will now put most of my energy into him, because he is most important. I'm not saying that I will stop working hard at teaching, but I will better use my time and I will have to re-structure things. Maybe I get my school work done at school. Maybe I wait until late at night after Jack goes to bed. And maybe, just maybe, we'll win the lottery and I won't have to worry about any of it!!!