Juggling Two

I thought that having two kids would be like having two cats. You gotta feed one, so what's the difference if there are two? You gotta change one diaper, so changing a second isn't so tough. I thought that, in the beginning, it would be the easiest. Dani would sleep a lot and I could focus on Jack and when Dani wasn't sleeping, I could focus on her. Two things threw a wrench into my plan: 1) Dani is a crappy napper and 2) Eventually babies start staying awake longer regardless of how crappy they are at napping. I have now realized that having two children means always feeling guilty. It's so busy--we work all day, get home and Jack is demanding of attention right away. We cook dinner, give bottles, play, give baths, and read stories. After putting Jack to bed, we start Dani's bedtime. I often feel guilty that I am short changing Dani. I wish I could give Dani the chance to be an only child for a little while too so she could feel what it's like to get ALL of the attention.. I wish I could actually parent them both in parallel universes so that they could have both the benefits of being only children and the benefits of having a sibling. I feel like I read to Jack more and at a younger age. But when I bring Dani into bed to read, he attention span just isn't quite as long and she gets fussy faster. So she'll leave after a couple of stories. When I was talking to Jack, he was part of every conversation. Now Dani has to share. I am doing the best I can but when I'm with one kid, I always want to give the other some attention. And Jack takes up a LOT of attention. Until Dani, he only knew what it was like to have 100% of the attention. Therefore, he demands more now. He also can do more so he wants to do more with you. Dani has never known anything but sharing. Fortunately, she's an amazing little girl who seems quite content with her life so it makes things a lot easier. She is smiley and happy all the time. She loves to be talked to but is also happy to just sit where the action is. She's a pretty easy going unless she is hungry or tired and can't fall asleep. I remember being terrified when I was pregnant. First I was worried about her being healthy. After we found out she was fine, I was worried that she would be difficult, especially since Jack was such an easy baby. I thought, "there's no way we could get so lucky twice." But we have and I simply couldn't be more grateful. So if the biggest hurdle these kids have is knowing that there is another kid in their house that their parents also love and adore with all their hearts, I think we'll be okay.